Unlocking Emotional Wellness: A Guide for Busy Working Moms
Emotional wellness is a cornerstone of a fulfilling and balanced life. It's about being aware of our emotions, managing them effectively, and maintaining resilience in the face of all of life's challenges.
It’s something that’s not taught to most of us as kids or as adults. We may believe we are doing “good enough” in this area, but when we really peel it back, most of us are not really thriving when it comes to our own emotional landscape, or how aware we are of our emotions and how they drive our actions and result.
Perhaps the most glaring is that it’s wildly uncommon for us to know and use healthy methods of processing and dealing with our uncomfortable emotions (like guilt, shame, anger, frustration, resentment, anxiety, etc).
Distracting ourselves on our phones, sipping wine while binge watching a show, or organizing every drawer may be some ways we’ve developed to relieve or distract ourselves from having to feel those uncomfortable things, but our emotions are stored in our bodies, and they will come up and out, in one way or another.
Today, let’s explore the science behind emotional well-being, signs of nervous system dysregulation versus regulation, and practical tips for busy working moms to prioritize their emotional well-being.
Understanding Emotional Wellness: At its core, emotional wellness involves recognizing and expressing emotions authentically, coping with stress in healthy ways, and nurturing positive relationships. The mind-body connection/superhighway (“the nervous system” or autonomic nervous system) plays a crucial role in emotional wellness, with our thoughts, feelings, and physical sensations deeply intertwined.
Signs of Nervous System Dysregulation: Persistent stress, difficulty concentrating, irritability, disrupted sleep patterns, and physical symptoms like muscle tension and headaches are signs of nervous system dysregulation.
Signs of Nervous System Regulation: Inner calm, emotional flexibility, resilience, emotional intelligence, improved decision-making skills, and stronger relationships indicate a regulated nervous system.
Practical Tips for Busy Working Moms:
Practice Mindfulness: Incorporate mindfulness techniques like deep breathing or body scanning into your daily routine to anchor yourself in the present moment and cultivate calm.
Prioritize Nurturing Yourself: Carve out small pockets of time to care for yourself during your week — plan ahead and schedule it in your calendar - taking a walk over lunch, grabbing tea with a friend to catch up (even if you only have 20 minutes), indulging in a creative hobby for 30 minutes - to replenish your emotional reserves.
Seek Social Support: Build a support network of friends, family, or fellow moms who understand and validate your experiences to provide emotional support and perspective as you navigate and grow together, holding each other accountable to prioritizing yourselves.
Engage in Joyful Activities: Spend quality time with loved ones, pursue creative interests, or volunteer for a cause you care about on at least a monthly basis to nourish your soul and enhance your sense of overall purpose and contribution in life.
Practice Self-Compassion: Work to cultivate a more non-judgmental attitude towards yourself, recognizing that it's okay to have it all together and get everything done, and allowing yourself grace during difficult moments.
In today's fast-paced world, learning to tune into and regulate our emotions can have a profound impact on our lives, relationships, and overall well-being.
Here are some real-life stories of clients who have experienced profound transformation through the practice of emotional regulation.
Chronic Conflict with Spouse
Christina, a hospitalist and mother of 2 young children, struggled with frustration in her relationship with her spouse, causing stress in the home that carried over into work and parenting. Through learning and practicing emotional regulation techniques, Christina was able to identify and communicate her needs with clarity and empathy to her spouse, as well as learning how she could figure out ways to give herself what she was craving. This deepened her connection to herself, as well as her partner, and brought more joy and harmony into their home.
Setting Boundaries with Your Kids
Discover Emily's story, a busy working mom who often felt overwhelmed and exhausted by the demands of parenting 3 children under the age of 10 who fought all the time and always competed for her attention. She would get frustrated and yell at them especially when they were fighting or being demanding, and felt like she didn’t have the calm control she wanted as a mom. By practicing emotional regulation techniques such as mindfulness and self-compassion, Emily learned how to set clear and loving boundaries with her children without resorting to yelling or aggression. She was able to transform her parenting style, gain confidence, and enjoy more respectful interactions with and between her kids.
Navigating Work Satisfaction
Jessica, a trauma surgeon with a teenager, felt drained and unfulfilled with her job. She was resentful of the long hours and calls that didn’t seem to lessen over time, and felt like everyone was taking advantage of her as a people pleaser and woman in a male-dominated field. Through self-reflection, introspection, and aligning her passions and values, she was able to identify parts of her work that filled her up vs those that drained her, set boundaries to protect her well-being at work, and prioritize the tasks at work that made her feel more aligned and fulfilled. She went from being ready to leave medicine altogether to reducing to 0.8 FTE OR/clinic time, focus on medical education which lit her up, and find her groove and feel more energized.
These real-life stories highlight the transformative power of emotional regulation in our lives.
By tuning into and regulating our emotions, we can navigate challenges with greater ease and resilience, foster healthier relationships, and cultivate a greater sense of fulfillment and satisfaction in our daily lives.
Quick Win for Today: Take a few moments to pause, close your eyes, and tune into your breath. Notice the sensations of each inhale and exhale, allowing yourself to let go of any tension or stress. Even just a few minutes of mindful breathing can help reset your nervous system and promote calm amidst the busyness of daily life.
Wrapping it Up: By prioritizing emotional wellness, busy working moms empower themselves to show up as their best selves in every aspect of life, fostering deeper connections, greater resilience, and a more fulfilling sense of purpose. Start today by implementing these practical tips and notice the positive impact on your well-being and overall quality of life.
If you are ready to take a step in the direction of greater emotional awareness and getting more clear on how you want to feel more of the time, grab my free guide to getting started here:
https://sarahwittry.myflodesk.com/desiredfeelings
Until next week, sending hope & healing your way,
Sarah
