Processing Grief with Compassion: A Guide for Professional Moms

As a professional mom with four kids, I’ve learned that life can be a beautiful, chaotic mix of joy and challenge. Between juggling career demands, managing a household, and trying to maintain some semblance of balance, there are moments when grief hits in ways that feel almost impossible to handle. Whether it’s the loss of a loved one, the end of a chapter, or a personal dream that no longer seems attainable, grief can feel like it takes over everything.

As a mom, our instincts often push us to keep moving forward for our kids—often putting their needs before our own. But what happens when we’re holding onto pain and loss that we don’t know how to process? I’ve been there, and I know how heavy that weight can feel.

Today, I want to talk about something deeply personal: processing grief with compassion—not just for the ones we love, but for ourselves as well.

Why Grief Is Hard for Professional Moms

When you’re a professional mom, there’s an unspoken expectation that you have to juggle it all: your job, your family, your relationships, and your own well-being. It’s like you’re always running on a treadmill—trying to keep up with the speed of life.

I remember the times when grief would hit me hard, yet I had to show up for my kids. I’d put on a brave face and do the things that needed to be done: making breakfast, helping with homework, going to work, and keeping life moving forward. But deep down, I felt a sense of loss that was hard to articulate. It’s not just about the external responsibilities—it’s also about the emotional load we carry as mothers.

In the whirlwind of motherhood, we often don’t have the space to grieve openly or fully. There’s always someone needing us, and the needs of our children can sometimes drown out the space for our own emotions. But here’s the thing: you deserve to grieve. You deserve the time and space to process those tough emotions, especially when you’re also navigating the demands of being a mom.

Processing Grief with Compassion

When grief enters our lives, we can sometimes feel as though we’re in an emotional whirlwind—uncertain of how to handle the deep pain. But as moms, it’s vital to show up for ourselves just as much as we show up for our kids. Here are a few strategies that I’ve found helpful for processing grief with compassion:

1. Give Yourself Permission to Feel

As moms, we often feel that we must “hold it together” for our children, but that can lead to suppressing our emotions. I’ve learned that it’s okay to let your kids see you feeling vulnerable, as it shows them that it’s normal to experience and express a wide range of emotions. Give yourself permission to feel grief without guilt. Your emotions don’t make you any less of a mom—they make you human.

2. Create Space for Quiet Moments

I’ve had moments where I needed to step away from the busy demands of family life to process grief. Whether it’s taking a walk alone, spending a few minutes journaling, or just sitting in silence for a while, these quiet moments help me reconnect with my inner self. If you can, carve out small pockets of time during the day where you can check in with your emotions. Even if it’s just five minutes, it can make a big difference.

3. Share Your Grief with Your Kids (in Age-Appropriate Ways)

Our children may not fully understand grief, but they do understand emotions. I’ve found that sharing grief with my kids in a way that matches their developmental level has helped both them and me. For example, when my kids were younger, I explained grief through simple language like, "I’m feeling really sad right now because we’ve lost someone we love." This opens up the conversation and allows them to understand that sadness is normal and something that we can all feel together.

4. Create a Memory Ritual for Your Family

After a loss, I’ve found comfort in creating family rituals to honor and remember the person or experience we’re grieving. For example, lighting a candle during family meals or talking about happy memories before bed can help us feel connected to what we’ve lost. These rituals not only give us space to grieve together, but they also allow my children to express their emotions and feel supported through their own grief journey.

5. Seek Support—You Don’t Have to Do It Alone

Grief can feel like an incredibly lonely journey, but it doesn’t have to be. Seeking support from friends, family, or a professional therapist can help you process the emotions you may feel unable to express. For me, having a community of like-minded professional moms who understand the unique challenges of both career and motherhood has been invaluable. If you're looking for support, consider joining the Vibrant Humans Facebook group, where we share resources and encouragement to help each other thrive, even during tough times.

You Are Not Alone

As moms, we often feel like we have to carry everything on our shoulders, but the truth is, we don’t have to do it alone. Grief is part of the human experience, and it’s okay to take time to process and heal. By giving yourself permission to grieve, finding small ways to honor your emotions, and creating space for healing, you are not only caring for yourself but also modeling emotional resilience for your children.

If you’re grieving right now, I encourage you to be kind to yourself. Take small steps to process your emotions, and know that your grief is valid. You don’t need to have all the answers or “move on” right away. Healing takes time, and it’s okay to be where you are.

Join the Vibrant Humans Community for Support

If you feel overwhelmed and need a safe space to connect with other professional moms who understand the emotional weight you carry, I invite you to join the Vibrant Humans Facebook group. It’s a place where we support each other, share resources, and walk through life’s challenges together. You deserve to be surrounded by a community that lifts you up, and I would love to have you join us.

Click here to join the Vibrant Humans Facebook group: Join Now

Remember, grief doesn’t make you any less of a mom. In fact, it makes you more human, more compassionate, and more connected to your deepest emotions. You’ve got this, mama.